Okay, perhaps one could slot people who violate norms into the category of microaggressors?
It is possible that Lucy M has already captured some of this ambivalence:
And, like political correctness, it is both a) a brilliant and fundamentally sound idea that would, if properly practised, result in greater happiness for a greater number of people; and b) capable of quickly leading practitioners down spiralling corridors of guilt, anxiety and negativity that hide the original departure point from view.
And while I rather like her concept of 'microniceties', I regret to say that I am probably not going to notice people who are holding their parting conversation in such a way that they are not blocking the top of the stairway to the egress (something I came across in the course of this week) as much as people who, neglectful of the fact that people might want to get past, do thus hinder the free flow of traffic.
Niceties, perhaps, are about reducing the friction and not negatively snagging one's attention.
I suspect that niceties have to rise above the level of micro to be noticed.
Where Angels Fear to Tread by Thomas E. Sniegoski I switched from audiobook to ebook for this series because I wasn't loving the writing style enough to want it read to me. I found the beginning annoying. But I've only read a few pages so far.
The Making of the Fittest: DNA and the Ultimate Forensic Record of Evolution by Sean B. Carroll (audiobook)
What did you recently finish reading? Dangerous Mourning by Anne Perry, #2 in the Inspector William Monk series, set in the mid-19th century. Audiobook well narrated by Davina Porter, one of my favorite narrators. Although it's called the Monk series, this book's main protagonist is Hester Latterly—she does the primary footwork for solving the mystery. I really liked it for its attention to class and women's issues, and for character development. I also think Perry does a good job with dialogue.
Late Eclipses by Seanan McGuire, the fourth book in the October Daye series. Liked it a lot. McGuire does a great job of pacing and reveals and drawing out the story arc.
What do you think you’ll read next? I'm going on a trip without much Internet access, so I downloaded several ebooks:
A Letter of Mary by Laurie R. King (#3 in the Mary Russell series) Larger Than Death by Lynne Murray (#1 in the Josephine Fuller series) Cranford by Elizabeth Cleghorn Gaskell The Vampire Files, Volume Two omnibus by P. N. Elrod (contains books 4–6 in the series: Art in the Blood, Fire in the Blood, and Blood on the Water) Ventus by Karl Schroeder
Cool Thing I discovered - glancing through an auction catalogue at work and riffling fast through the section on medieval illuminated manuscripts, my eye caught a woman's name and she was the person to whom this particular ms was attributed and A Known Artist. Apparently this was not entirely unknown in ye medievalz: women were making books in the Middle Ages and illuminating them, some in convents and some in family workshops in the secular world. Okay, hit me again with that explanation about the very limited possibilities available to women in The Past...
Annoying thing: someone, in the debate on women TV presenters and ageism, referring to Mary Beard as 'an old woman'. Beard is several years younger than moi, and still in that phase I would consider middle age.
Ever wanted to connect with the millions of New Yorkers walking past you? Each day brings opportunities to make new friends and share experiences. All too often, we can forget to notice the people around us. Nametag Day aims to break this barrier and strengthen the human element of the New York experience, adding a bit of spontaneity and silliness to people's day.
Possibly one should be relieved that they are not also about giving hugs?
Is it just me, or would other people fill in the tag with 'Jane Smith' or equivalent? (or, of course, not Jane Smith if that was their name.)
Though I would envisage, if they tried this in London, that well-known London-survival strategy, avoiding people's eyes and not engaging, or even crossing the road.
crazycrone @ 03:38 pm: Amazy Update, etc...
...She's 'nice and relaxed' is eating well, and has put on a bit of weight. Awwww. Watched GERVAISE, a B&W Zola adaptation with Maria Schell. Not bad, and I just love the look of those oldies. A bunch of poor squatters was turfed out yesterday evening, from the building accross the road where the Roux brothers used to have their pastries made. Years ago, it was quite consoling, on one's weary wait for the slavery-bound bus, to savour that scrummy smell wafting over. I really felt sad for the poor buggers sitting there with their dog and their mattresses. They were quiet and did no harm. I for one, didn't even know they were there. In the park, I watched about six crows on the wing, attacking what appreared to be a crane (from the Common, I guess-) It was rather scary and very loud. They were really having a go. Hope the big long-necked bird got away OK...
matociquala @ 08:08 am: i promise i'm not trying to make your life harder
So, I'm reasonably confident that the Police's "Every Breath You Take" is a savvy enough song to know just how deeply sophipathological it is. I'm pretty confident about Blondie's "One Way Or Another." (Still amuses me that the first couple of seasons of Farscape use a modified but identifiable version of the riff in the theme. Because yeah.)
And I know Sarah McLachlan's "Possession" does, because she wrote it that way on purpose.
I'm willing to give unreliable narrators a lot of benefit of the doubt, and people in art do not exist to be role models.
Dido's "White Flag," on the other hand...
I'm pretty sure this song does not know how fucked up it is. I'm just saying. And I'm pretty sure the object of the song needs a restraining order.
I was thinking, as I walked up the road to the Tube (I will not, dr rdrs, recount the preceding sequence of thoughts that got me there) that you don't find the concept of 'nymphomania' around these days to the extent that it was in my younger days.
Which led me to wonder whether morally-loaded terms such as 'slut' had replaced a medically-pathologising, if still pejorative, one (which was always a bit confused between the idea of a woman with a high sex drive and the poor creature who was desperately seeking an actual satisfaction that eluded her).
However, a quick google suggests that it is still at least in vernacular use to some extent, though the top hit is all about debunking the concept:
Calling someone a nymphomaniac or accusing them of nymphomania isn't something that can be defined by science. Nymphomania is a layperson's term used to label a woman, or a nympho, whose sex drive or sexual activity is subjectively deemed too high. The term "nymphomania," is not scientifically meaningful simply because there are no specific criteria that would define a nymphomaniac. In other words, there isn't a way to determine how much sexual desire or activity is too much. .... The label of nymphomania is used in a pejorative and derogatory manner, almost exclusively in reference to women. To many men, the idea of a woman with a greater sex drive than their own is somewhat threatening, so they may use the label to preserve their own egos by "proving" that the woman is abnormal. Similarly, men with sexual dysfunction might accuse their partners of being oversexed in an effort to hide their own fears or sense of inadequacy
Many years ago - it must have been c. 1970, the summer I was in New York - I picked up a copy of Playboy which was lying around the place I was sharing, and in the correspondence columns, presumably in response to former discussion about the female sex drive, was the brilliantly circular argument, 'The only women I've ever met who were as horny as men were nymphomaniacs'. And that was back when Teh Menz prided themselves on being the logical sex...
randomdreams @ 08:49 pm:
We said we weren't going to do this. skazat pointed out that this violates the cardinal rule of not sticking your dick in crazy. But... A: it runs. B: we can't make it worse than it already is. Regression to the mean implies it will improve. As such:
1. ROLL BAR. 2. New seatbelts. 3. Pirate skull-and-crossbones spraypainted across rear end. 4. Speedometer fixed.
Then it'll be roadworthy and ready for experimentation.